The Holy Spirit Comes and Will Not Be Refused

Lately my thoughts and life has been filled with Loss, grief, a longing for what can not be. Missing what was. A deep sadness that cannot be touched by human hands and hearts. The only thing I crave, long for is silence, solitude. That silence, solitude and sadness can’t be filled with things here where I am at. Maybe not even where I might be going. I have realized that I have made myself an exoskeleton, a hard covering to protect the soft vulnerable, painful parts of me. Not even I dare to touch, poke, prod those parts. It’s called survival. I’ve been wounded, hurt, broken, diminished so many times in so many ways that even for me to look at those parts of me is deadly. I know that for most of those I come in contact with that this is also a fact of life for them, for you. Those soft vulnerable painful places I surround in protection, I hide from the world, I try to carry on my own, the Holy Spirit comes and will not be refused, he touches the things I can not and makes them whole, useful, valuable, he heals the raw spots, soothes the rough painful edges. And even though I resist with every ounce of strength I have he leaves the door wide open and the windows of my soul lets in one more day. He whispers you got this and for some reason I once again believe.

You got this, too.

Love, Pam